Are You Missing Out?
A common thread that many of my main characters hold is the lie that they don’t belong or aren’t included. After writing ten books and noticing the trend, I had to ask myself why. Have I or do I struggle in this area? The blatant answer was yes. I moved a few times growing up, and I’m still haunted by those awkward moments in the lunchroom when you walk in not knowing anyone, looking for a place to sit and any kind face that would welcome you. I desired to be liked, to be known, and to be in the know.
Living in the same town for 25 years, these issues should have worked themselves out. Instead, the fear of missing out changed from an insecurity of I'm missing out because they don’t know me to I’m missing out because they don’t want me. At least, until I gave it to God.
Today’s social media puts the fear of missing out (FOMO) on steroids. Selfies are meant to make other people jealous. They cry, look where I am, or look who I’m with. Social media magnifies the issue, but it has been around since the beginning of time. The fear of missing out can be traced back to the Garden of Eden.
One would think that with only two people on the planet, FOMO wouldn’t be a problem, but the snake deceived Eve into believing that she was missing out on the knowledge of good and evil. Then, Adam also ate the apple so he wouldn’t miss out. The devil convinced Eve that she would be gaining something. Genesis 3:4 says, “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. ‘For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.’” But in reality, their FOMO cost Eve and Adam a great deal.
They lost their close connection to God since God cannot be around sin. They were banished from the garden, subjected to hard labor in the fields, Eve faced pain in childbirth, they felt the shame of being naked, and all of mankind would suffer death until Jesus returns to issue in a sin-free heaven and earth. If only Adam and Eve could have realized how much better they had it, walking with God in the garden, rather than gaining the knowledge they believed they were missing out on.
How many of us thought we were missing out, only to discover that the knowledge came with consequences? Or maybe we understood the risks but believed we could manage, only to find out too late that we couldn’t.
Maybe it was going to that party your parents didn’t approve of.
Dating the guy or girl your friends warned you was no good.
Drinking or trying a substance
Becoming intimate before marriage.
Jumping to the next job.
Investing in the next stock market rage.
Buying the house, car, or boat you couldn’t afford.
If you haven’t heard of it, let me introduce you to JOMO, the joy of missing out. There is peace in doing things God’s way and staying in line with His will for our lives, and peace has been way underrated. Fast forward past the FOMO to the following day and the regrets that sink in, the headaches, and extra stress. Avoiding the mess can make peace become more appealing.